the big 7

And no, I'm not talking about sports.

I guess you could kind of put this under in Friday Confessional folder.

(post topic slightly stolen from here)

The First Love
Before I tell you this story, can I give you some advice? If you have to convince a guy to date you, you probably shouldn't be wasting your time. I was a sophomore in high school. He was a year older than I was. He was also the chorus teacher's son. He was an ass, but I thought his curly blonde hair and musical skills were the end all, be all of life, the universe and everything. I dated a couple guys before him, but nothing serious. Then, he finally decided (after a year of me harassing being friends with him, and him chasing two or three other girls,) that he would date me. I was over the FREAKING moon. I remember I even went to Prom with one of my friends so that we could be at Prom together, because he'd already asked and bought tickets for another girl. I borrowed a dress from my Mom's assistant at work. It was dark blue and silky and I felt very grown up.
Then, he dumped me while dropping me off at my friend's house using the line "You know I love you and you know I'd die for you, but I think we should see other people."  (I know, right?!)
I cried for probably 24 hours straight. Thankfully, I was at a party with some theatre friends that turned into a sleepover and one of my guy friends found me curled up in a ball crying at 3AM because it hurt too much to sleep (I did wind up dating him later, but not seriously.) Heartbreak sucks. For serious.

The Kid
We met at Allstate Chorus my junior year, and had a week or so of fun times that involved us getting chased out of a mall because he was carrying me around on his back. In all fairness, I was sporting a foot cast at the time, so walking was a bit of a dilemma. He didn't have a car, so it was a lot of my driving over to his house and bringing him back to mine because his parents were not terribly supportive of him...in general. He was kind of flaky and not a great kisser, but we had an awesome time together.
Until the summer, when he decided to audition for the summer show that my theatre puts on. And he got in and it was awesome, except that he flaked out on it (or, his parents made him flake out on it -- the details are still kind of fuzzy) because his family was going to the beach. Flaking out on something that important to me wasn't cool in my book. I honestly think this was just my excuse at the time, because I was kind of over it already. I wasn't very nice, in the end. I feel badly about that. (a side note: also had curly blonde hair, which is important because...)

The Cradle Robber
Actually, I was the cradle robber in this case. He was a sophomore and I was a senior (in high school,) and he chose me over one of the girls in the group that absolutely hated me in high school. He was tall with a giant curly blonde fro, (I told you it was important. We called this the boyfriend trend for some time. Actually, I guess I still do sometimes,) and he. was. perfect. Spontaneous, fun, musical, extremely smart, giving -- everything you could ask for. We dated for seven months before he broke up with me the first time on the floor of his den while he cried and told me that he didn't want it to end, but he just didn't love me anymore.
Then he went to Australia for ten days and called me (on a payphone. PAYPHONE!? HOW MUCH DID THAT CALL COST HIM, HOLY COW?!) at 3AM telling me he missed me. When he got back, we dated for another seven months before he called me and dumped me again. At this point, though, I was in college and it didn't sting as much as the first time, because I kind of saw it coming from a thousand miles away. I figured it gave me the opportunity to flirt with the bassonist that my best friend and I were hanging out with. (Yeah, that didn't work out well either. Can we say rebound?)


The Bad Boy
But not really. My friend Brockett called me up and asked me if I wanted to come be in a FSU film scene where they needed people to roller skate around a rink while they shot some scenes with the actual movie people. Well, the group of us that showed up weren't excellent skaters, but we had fun anyway. (I can skate forward, standing up straight. That's about the extent of my skills, y'all.)
During some down time, my friends I wound up sitting on a table that was next to the table he was sitting at with his friend. He was showing his friend pictures, so we joined in the picture-watching -- I think they were pictures from his recent trip to Israel? Maybe? He left to go do something else, and then they released us for the day, so I got ballsy and left my IM name on a note on his desktop.
He IMed me a little while later and we talked for a while. Then I went to St. John for 2 months (that's another story,) and we talked on the phone a couple times, but it's hard to talk to someone on the phone when you're on an island with no electricity in the camp after sunset.
When I got back to school in the Fall, we started hanging out. He was so. cool. He also told me multiple times he didn't want to date me. I pretended not to hear it and had fun hanging out with his friends watching him spin fire and draw things -- he was an excellent artist (I'm sure he still is) -- and riding around with him on his motorcycle. Bad ass, my friends.
After several times of him breaking up with me and flaking out, and me saying that I didn't care, I decided I finally did care and I'd had enough of him promising to call me or come over and then it not happening. We're still friends. He's probably one of the few people I dated that I still consider a friend. He's a pretty cool dude.

The Random Make-Out
It seems like all of my friends new him except me. We met at a party after a friend's senior recital, where we got drunk and made out with each other and another girl (who I, coincidentally, went to high school with.) We became inseparable shortly after and dated for a long time. Over two years. It was my greatest relationship, up until a point.
We were in love. IN LOVE. But that didn't stop him from slowly becoming kind of an asshole. He was mean to me. One thing that sticks in my mind is when he told me that my relationship with my mother was abusive. We were in China on a choir trip at the time and it's very difficult to not talk to your boyfriend while on a trip out of the country. I eventually wound up forgiving him without an apology.
And by forgiving I mean, it still haunts me. That he would say that  to me. Or even admit thinking that. Things fell farther apart when he graduated and started working night shift. And then after his night shifts, he'd go to friends houses, smoke (both weed and cigarettes) and get drunk and drive home and pass out on the couch in front of the television, instead of coming to bed.
And then he informed me at the end of the summer he was moving to Rochester, NY, with his roommate. And didn't invite me. Didn't even mention me coming with him.
I got to the point where I couldn't take it anymore, and when I met a nice British boy (who turned out to be not so nice, either, but that's another story,) who actually paid me attention and acted like I mattered, I broke down and broke up with my boyfriend. We were still living together, and it was horrible. He wound up being home more then than when we were together, so we talked and he wanted to figure things out. But I had it in my mind that this was not how I wanted the future of my relationship to go. And so I moved to Boston and didn't look back.
And by didn't look back, I mean I called him drunk several times telling him I missed him and loved it. It was bad.

The Foreigner
I met this kid on Facebook, on an app that no longer exists called 'SpeedDate.' I swear to you all, I did NOT sign up for SpeedDate -- it was an app that was for taking surveys that then turned into a dating app. I met him at the movie theatre the first time, cause I figured it was safe, and we hung out as friends for a while before we started dating. During this time, I discovered his family was ridiculously rich -- as in owned an island, rich -- and he was Canadian and moving back to Canada once he finished school. I planned to go with him.
Then he started being kind of controlling. And then very jealous. And then not very much fun. And on top of all this he smoked pot habitually. That in itself I have no problem with, but the fact that he would get upset that I wouldn't smoke with him kind of turned me off of the whole relationship.
He also adopted a cat while we were dating.
I miss his cat.

The One
I started dating Nate probably too quickly after The Foreigner. But I was so starved for niceness that when the nicest boy EVER wanted to hang out with me, I let it happen.
And then, as luck would have it, I actually still wanted to be with him after the first couple weeks. And then after the first couple months. And then after the first year.
We discovered we like the same things. We have similar tastes in music and movies. We are both up for adventure. We took a 5-month road trip together and I only sometimes didn't want to kill him at the end.
He is kind and gentle. He makes the decisions I don't want to make, cleans, and makes phone calls. He loves my cooking. He wants to provide for me. He wants me to be safe (to a fault.) He was me to always be around. He listens to me. He lets me get my way.
And so, I still want to be with him.
I like him, I guess.

{friend's wedding}

{road trip)

{valentine's day}